ignorance is not bliss
Yesterday three Russian boys, all with some sort of facial disfigurement, walked by my Kyrgyz friend Elya and I as we walked in the opposite direction. The sidewalk was just wide enough for them to walk past us with no trouble, but that would be considered normal behavior, something not common here. Elya’s on my right, the Russians are on the left, and as we walk past one another, we don’t even brush shoulders there’s so much room on the sidewalk.
As our paths cross, the Russian closest to me grabs my butt, and all three turn and make faces and noices at us as I flick them off. And I keep walking—that’s life here in Osh, Kyrgyzstan for you.
I don’t even think twice about these incidents anymore, let alone report them. They’re so common, I would be calling my Safety and Security Officer every other day. He could go door-to-door and find the dozens of boys and men who’ve touched me inappropriately in this town. [edited]
What’s the problem? they would ask. They’re just being boys. Ignore it.
Ignore it. That seems to be the motto in this town. If boys harass you, ignore it. If they grab your arm on the way to school every day, ignore it. If they throw snowballs at you, ignore it. When they bother you, it means they like you. You can’t imagine how many times I’ve heard that one. They like me, and that’s why they pull my hair? They like me, and that’s why, on days when I don’t wear my watch, at least 10 men will ask me the time?
[edited] It’s disturbing that I’ve given into it as well, despite my do-gooder, problem-solver approach to PC. I ignored the Russian boys just like I ignore all the Kyrgyz and Uzbek boys.
What more can I do, as one person among thousands? I can change my behavior, but the local women will continue to allow themselves to be harassed, and will keep letting “boys be boys,” negating any of my efforts.
posted by Unknown at 2:07 AM
3 Comments:
Hello,
This is very disconcerting. Has the PC advised you on what you can do to ameliorate your personal situation as well as those of the women in Osh? Surely repeated abuses are not ignored by the PC? I suppose it is extremely frustrating to have to grapple with women's issues in a non-Western society. I hope I get some training on how to deal with these issues.
K14 volunteer
11:13 AM
sexual harassment is present everywhere, in every society, some more visable and more serious than others- but it all makes me sick. it makes me sick that even in a modern, educated, supposedly equal society that I live in in washington dc I too can be sexually harrassed at work or on the streets, although I haven't had a complete stranger grab my ass in public... i'm with you in your feelings of frustration, anger, and helplessness about what we can do... i can see why women in some countries cover themselves from head to toe when they walk in public...it's sad that we want to just cover our eyes(and our bodies) and try and ignore what goes on around us sometimes..
9:53 PM
Hey K14!
I bet reading that a week before you leave for Kyrgyzstan didn't help, huh? Sorry. It is reality, and I've already done all the PC advises (don't dress inappropriately, do anything to attract unwanted attention, etc.). If walking fully-covered with a local in broad daylight doesn't prevent it, I can't imagine what will. But, shoot me an email and we'll talk further! Don't mind my comments--Kyrgyzstan is a really unique place!
Raabia
PS. PC does provide some training on how to deal with this.
2:22 AM
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